Ann's Weblog

I rarely drink. For some reason, just before putting the final touches on our dinner of chicken breasts and rice pilaf, I decided that I wanted a little shot of (generic brand) orange liqueur. I don't think I'd had more than a sip of that stuff, and had purchased it for a cheesecake flavouring. Um, after the FIRST little shot, it CALLED to me, again and again, and now I've had, I think, about FOUR little shots (maybe about 2 oz. each).

I KNOW this is nothing to "brag" about. For some reason, it takes the edge off of accumulated pain and assault and insult and criticism and anything else that troubles me from day to day. I DO count my blessings daily, and when I forget to, I feel guilty, considering the numbers of people... entire RACES, which have hardship beyond what most of us can understand.

I have planted another 600 fall bulbs. It's not as straightforward as I'd hoped. I've been digging in the perennial beds which are across one end of the main vegetable garden, and I'm determined to dig up perennials that I don't want and the damned QUACKGRASS that invades everything. I should be glad to get so much exercise, considering my weight problem, but by the end of the afternoon, I just wanted to lie down in the garden and bawl my eyes out. I ache all over. Perhaps that's one reason I kept swigging the liqueur. The work is too hard. The investment in time and money is too much. I'm exhausted, and ready for winter to set in...

I've received a couple of parcels from eBay this week! I can't tell all in my weblog, because Christmas is coming, but mostly what I've bought is for myself. I "won" a cubic zirconia "peridot" that is amazing, and I hope to ask my stepdaughter, who has a Fine Arts degree in jewellery, to make a setting for it. Then, enthused by THAT successful eBay win, I continued to search "size 8 rings" and found some MORE that I should own. I was mortified that my ring fingers somehow got to be "that big", but I DO find that there are beautiful rings to be had even in my size. I think that I need to give up on "dieting" into a size smaller in RINGS, because my grandmother's diamond and ruby ring is still in my safety deposit box, and should be resized so that I can wear and enjoy it. How I hate to be so many sizes bigger than my beloved ancestors, but that's the way it IS !

Had a pleasant conversation with my stepmother last night. Nothing is too eventful in her life or in mine, but we DID have a nice visit on the phone. My two daughters who live in Calgary were good to her at Thanksgiving, and my daughter who lives in Vancouver phoned her. Granny was very pleased!

I need to "sign off" for awhile and go for a rest (pass out for a little while...). Take care, my friends.

...but it has been just a fine day anyway. I really didn't push myself to work outside; the wind was fierce and cold, and most of the day there was driving rain. The drops were cold and almost SPOKE of the snow soon to come.

Although I could tell myself that it was too windy and cold, this didn't get the bulbs planted. I still have about 1200 left, and I have a plan. Gary has tilled the garden and is "done" with it; it will be easy digging THERE and I shall make a trench and throw hundreds in it. OF COURSE, I'll carefully set those tulips and daffodils in the upright position at approximately the right depth. The bulbs that I planted on Sunday were put into a "crosswise" row in the garden that I HAD reserved for perennials; I dug out and actually discarded many plants in favour of the fall bulbs. However, THAT is very hard digging, and I consoled myself that I was also getting rid of the quack grass and other weeds, or at least gaining some control of them.

The head librarian suggested that I could set up a table with my bulbs on at the library Friday and Saturday, and then just donate a percentage or a gift. It is a nice offer and great suggestion, and I will haul the damn things down there for one last try at snagging sales. One elderly lady from town actually was telling me what prices were for bulbs at SUPERSTORE in Prince George, and I patiently explained that no one like ME could compete with those prices. I will keep planting these bulbs for myself, as winter and snow will come soon. They will not be wasted.

I was at the Beanery for lunch again today. My friend who cooks at the coffee shop makes soup and sandwich lunches that make people feel totally nurtured (speaking, of course, for myself!). There used to be a more elaborate "specials" board when I worked there: we always had TWO major entrées, and sandwiches were, for ME, an inconvenient sideline. I was thrilled to be the cook there for about 6 weeks (last year in April), but I was getting burned out and couldn't keep up with dog grooming and chores at home.

Other than dropping off some craft items for sale at the Whistle Stop Gallery, all I did today was clean a drawer, bake cookies, and "work" at the computer. I picked up some things at the post office which I took over to the Beanery to "show and tell"; one friend thinks I've become hooked on eBay again, and told me to drop a hint if I want them to "do an intervention"! In truth, I've been thinking of listing some things for sale on eBay again... books that I've bought impulsively, or garage sale finds.

Really, we've had almost NO summer weather. What I'm thinking about winter now is "bring it on!". I even have some Christmas gifts organized, on the shelves or in my mind.

The only thing about winter that I truly dread is my tendency to be inactive and put on weight. I haven't lost the weight that I thought I MIGHT this summer. Every single morning I wake up with thoughts of rebuke for myself. The negative thinking and reproach seems to loop endlessly in my mind: I would NEVER, EVER, be this hard on a friend or a stranger! After I get the bulbs planted and I am not so busy dog grooming (in other words, when I'm tempted to "hole up" for the winter) I resolve to go back to the gym in town, or AT LEAST out to my grooming shop to use the elliptical trainer. I feel too shy to appear in the gym, but I MUST do it. I feel heavy and old, and though I'm looking forward to a Bar Mitzvah that Gary and I will travel to in 2 weeks, I'm also feeling very self-conscious, mortified, to meet new people. It's only MY fault and my responsibility, and I KNOW what to do.

Well, on that cheery note, I'll sign off, and go surfing eBay again and chat with the Gardening pals online. Hope you are well, any who have come to read my blog. Thanks for visiting.

Strange couple of days. I don't even know what order to tell the little anecdotes in...

I was grooming a VERY old poodle yesterday: a favourite client of mine, Pepsi. Just as I was finishing the job, a very large diesel vehicle came lumbering up the driveway: it was a Mercedes Benz travelling unit/ industrial type motor home, with European licence plates. I wish I had taken a picture.

A pleasant looking man got out and introduced himself as "Willy", and said that he already knew who I was, from the local Info Centre. He was travelling with his girlfriend and teenaged daughter. They had found a CAT in the "bush" off the highway near here, which was clearly starving. Willy said that because it "meowed" to them, they knew that it had been a pet which was "put out" (abandoned). They wanted to take the cat to the vet to get its shots and documentation, so that the young daughter could take it back to Germany!

They were asking me, if the cat was too debilitated to travel, would I take it here. I believed that Willy meant I could nurse it back to health and they would pay me to put it on a plane for Germany (hey! they were already willing to transport the cat...). Or, perhaps, I thought, Willy would continue on his North and Central American TOUR, and return in person for this special animal.

When I told hubby about this whole exchange, I told him that indeed it was a REALLY nice cat; but when he asked what made the little creature so special, all I could say was that, "It purred when I petted it!".

At any rate, I got the poodle finished and sent home, and then went into town for groceries and "coffee time". When I returned, Willy and family had been back, and had dropped off the cat. They said that there was no time for the cat to get its vaccinations and paperwork done for transport... so I was to nurse it back to health and find it a suitable home (or keep it myself). Gary had put it into a kennel with a soft bed, so the cat was quite comfortable. I added food and water and some stroking. Although I refuse to take in strays as a rule, I could not have turned away this friendly, emaciated animal.

By morning, the thin black cat was looking a little perkier, but I couldn't tell if it had eaten any of the dry food, so I went to town to buy canned food and other treats for him (a young tom). While I was away, Willy came BACK with his women, saying that his daughter had CRIED the whole night long and hadn't slept a wink: Willy was going to take the cat even though the daughter had to return to Germany. So, DAD is going to travel with the cat until such time as it's well enough and documented enough to send overseas!

Now THAT was a long story about something fairly trivial, but these are the things that make each day different and often very special.

Picked up my new stove from Sears. I loaded it ALL BY MYSELF onto my truck, because, well... that's too long a story. There WAS no one else to help. Gary was here when I got home, so at least there were the two of us to unload the appliance. Upon tearing the cardboard from it, we could see that one corner was dented, and since the packaging HADN'T been damaged we believe that the damned thing was dented before leaving the warehouse! The best part of this story was that today the Sears office agreed to take $126 dollars (15%) off the price of the stove, and also to investigate, as this was the THIRD appliance in 2 weeks to arrive damaged.

AND THEN... Gary went to make pancakes this morning, and discovered that the two left burners would ONLY heat on "HIGH" ! So, I made a another phonecall to Sears, and they are now going to send a technician around to fix the stove. At least Sears wants to make things right and keep their customers!

Two weeks ago, we got a new microwave from Sears, and had to send IT back because it didn't work, but that's a dim memory now because the replacement works like a dream.

We had an electrician doing some upgrading in the house today. He was quick and efficient and has a little more to do on another day, but he wants to trade his labour for... dog boarding and horse shoeing!! Dang, it's great to be living in a small community.

Tomorrow I'm going to TRY to sort out the chaff from my unsuccessful yard sale last weekend. I have great things for the thrift shops and the "swap shed" at the transfer station. I convinced myself to put all those things in the garage sale, and although so many items didn't sell, I am loathe to put it back in the house or shop. I'd rather give it away than throw it away.

FRIDAY, I will offer my fall bulbs from a table outside the Beanery in town. It will be my last attempt at flogging what I thought would be so popular. Gary said, "You watch, now... next year you might decide not to order any bulbs, and dozens of people will be asking for them. Doesn't mean you have to offer them, though." My friend Rhonda who gave her consent for this bulb sale outside the restaurant, suggested I do only "pre-ordered and prepaid" sales, next year. I will keep my fingers crossed for Friday: please wish me luck!

I think I'm all "talked" out. Nothing too profound has been going on, but I find these days quite interesting. Soon I MUST get the leftover perennials planted, and of course the bulbs that don't sell, but I'm not feeling as overworked as I had been. Compared to last fall, when our father fell ill and suffered and died, it is a GOOD autumn.

Count your blessings every day. Thanks for visiting. ~Ann

Even though I entitled this post "busy days", it hasn't been too hectic. I think it's all the work that BECKONS which makes me feel busier than I really am, and there's more that should be accomplished in a day than I have time and energy for. I don't WANT the snow to come early, but once that happens, there will be some jobs that just CAN'T be done.

Yesterday I had a 16 year old Cocker Spaniel to groom. The poor thing is quite decrepid, but the one thing she can do very well is EAT, and is quite obese. Grooming this dog seems a huge task because I'm lifting greater weight, and on the grooming table, she won't STAND UP to let me groom her legs, belly, backside. Then, if I get her lying down, and start the clippers, she jumps up. Up, down, up, down, and if I try to support her weight with my "spare" hand while clipping her, she puts all of her weight on me. I am going to invent some kind of a support/bench/roll to allow these old obese dogs to drape their weight over; I've seen "slings" that support their weight from above, too. At any rate, I got through the grooming job, poor gross thing, and as usual, if the owner didn't leave the dog so long between clippings, it wouldn't be so difficult.

Speaking of which, earlier in the week, while I tried to get ready for my Yard Sale, the phone rang. This was a customer whose matted dog I had groomed the day before, and as always, I believed I had done my best work: the dog went home free of tangles and smelling like apple blossoms. Every time I have to remove urine and feces soiled fur from a dog I think, "Ohhhh I'm not getting PAID enough...". The customer was calling to tell me that although she had been pleased with my work in the past, she was very disappointed in the job I had done THIS time. My heart just felt like it turned over. The lady could have just matter-of-factly asked if she could bring the dog back and have me "even him out", but instead went into quite a long diatribe. I did get her to bring the dog back, and I could see that I could have done a better job in spots, but also, it seemed that the owner had changed her mind about leaving a mustache on Fluffy. After I re-groomed her dog, she DID seem satisfied. *sigh*

Today I groomed ANOTHER elderly cocker spaniel mix, who is not in the best of health either. She was as good as she knows how to be: another dog not able to "stand up" for more than a few seconds, and also VERY heavy for her height and type. The owner seemed very pleased, so that made it a good morning!

This afternoon I picked up lunch at the Beanery (the bistro that I make cheesecakes for), and took it to my friend who works at an insurance office. She is alone with too much work, and as it turned out, had forgotten to bring her lunch! So we had lovely beef barley soup, cheese and vegetable sandwiches, Chai tea lattés, and two different kinds of cheesecake. My friend's daughter stopped by for a visit and we ended up sharing, which made the quantity of DESERT seem not so decadent! It was like a little picnic; we all enjoyed that break.

Did a housecall for dog toenail clipping on the way home. I haven't done much since then except make a fairly large batch of turkey vegetable soup to freeze for when I visit stepmother in Calgary again.

Now, back to the kitchen to start some supper. It has been a GOOD day.

Thanks for reading ! Hope your day have been as good. ~Ann

Tonight we went to the the birthday party of a friend of ours (he turned 65) and the theme was also "Octoberfest". We were told that the beer, meat and desserts were supplied, and just to bring, if we wished, another warm dish for the occasion. Seemed reasonable, since it was threatening to SNOW, that we were "not going to have salads". The Oom-pa-pa music was absolutely appalling.

For the soirée, I made Boston Baked Beans... from scratch; lovingly tended them IN THE CROCKPOT all day while my Fall Bulb and Yard Sale was on.

Speaking of which, I got very poor attendance at my bulb/yard sale AGAIN. I'm trying not to take it personally, not that people are staying away thinking, "Oh, it's just ANN, let's not go..."! SERIOUSLY, I'm not feeling that way, but I believe this is the last time I try this.

In the first place, in my area, the bulbs are a bit of "a hard sell". We don't have a proper garden centre, and we're out of town; folks don't just impulsively stroll in (as to a regular store) to buy tulips, daffodils and crocuses, etc., no matter how special the selection! I have not even reached the break-even point, and there are THOUSANDS of bulbs left to plant. The wholesale growers want orders to be for minimum quantities, so that limits the selection here; it's all a moot point if people don't come to look anyway.

The other "killer" consideration is that the FREIGHT is frightful ! I paid $145. freight on seven boxes of bulbs.

I'm disgusted and discouraged. Even the weather did not cooperate today; even though it did not actually RAIN today (or yesterday while I set up), the wind was bitterly cold and damp and relentlous. While I packed up what was left of the yard sale, and that was a BIG job, I was freezing cold and feeling sorry for myself. I have tons of stuff to get rid of, so I'll make the rounds of two "church" outlets and the "swap shed" at the transfer station (dump site).

I have hundreds of bulbs to plant, too. I will NOT do this to myself again. I'm still interested in getting perennials in the spring, mainly because I have cases of brand new "signature" 1/2 gallon pots in which to plant the bare roots that I get from the growers. I'll give it my best shot next year and then decide if it's worth continuing.

And I just had another horrible thought. I have a case of Amaryllis bulbs coming this month! I supposed I'll give them to friends, or as Christmas gifts, or sell 'em on eBay! I had forgotten that the shipment of those amaryllis is delayed... and that will be ANOTHER hit for freight. Crap.

Things are pretty good around here otherwise. It could take a month of Sundays to plant the perennials that I have left, and the fall bulbs, but I'll just get done what I can before it's time to hibernate again.

I must plan to get to Calgary again soon. I'm really dragging my heels on that one, but I know my two daughters who live there will appreciate my visit, and my stepmother, in her own way, too. I usually take stepmom a few dozen containers of soup, chili, rice pilaf, and other small meals. Myrtle does not have the energy or desire to cook well for herself, so she can just "nuke" these little containers of food. Also, when my girls visit "Granny", they, too, can have some easy meals to prepare and don't have to spend so much time in the kitchen in order to have something to eat with their grandma. I'm not trying to impress Myrtle, I just want to think that, at the end of the road, I've done some little thoughtful things. She hasn't always "deserved" thoughtfulness and respect from my sister and me, but now she is elderly and infirm and most of us will be there one day.

Well, this is it for today. I'm anxious to check in with my gardening chat friends. Sorry I neglect my weblog so much: it's strange that I do, because most days I think at least once, "Oh, I should write about THIS in my blog tonight!", and then I don't get it done. I never was a good diary-keeper.

Stay well, my friends.