Aw, “Boo Hoo”
We are preparing to go down to Vernon to see our friend Sharon’s play at the O’Keefe Ranch. We’re going during the days that we can take my daughter Susan on her days off from cooking at a remote camp. I always love the company of any of my daughters or Gary’s daughter, so I’ve been looking forward to this time. Gary and I haven’t been away together for two whole days for ages.
Even with all that is positive about this little jaunt, as I’ve cleaned up the truck this morning I’ve felt lower and lower. I feel shy about being out “in public”, among the crowds that are at the show and elsewhere on a busy summer weekend in the Okanagan. I’ve not lost the weight this year that I had planned to. I feel old, homely and fat, and I don’t have cool (in any sense of the word) clothes which FIT, and certainly no time to shop while we’re out this weekend. It’s silly: I don’t want to GO and I don’t want to NOT GO. I’ve got over being unhappy about missing Farmer’s Markets because attending the show and travelling when Susan can is much more important. Also, I wouldn’t want to keep Gary and Susan from going.
There is nothing to do but pretend that I feel normal and get through it. And eat less (wan smile). It’s merely a cycle, a “blue” period, that I have to talk myself out of, as always. I have so many blessings. The weather here at home has suddenly turned to SUMMER.
Our friend Zev will be wanting to get haying done just while we planned to be away. Gary will go out to Zev’s farm and help tomorrow, at least, and then get back at it Sunday, if the weather has stayed dry and warm. Not only is he a great help to Zev, Gary at this time of year gets paid in hay, for his horses. If the weather “holds” there will be a lot of relieved hay-making farmers in the Valley!
There are so many things needing doing around here, it’s almost paralyzing. Plenty of “green stuff” in the garden could be harvested, raspberries picked, weeding of terribly neglected flower beds, and household tasks like tidying and cleaning should be done. I’ve been waiting for an order of wholesale jars for my preserves to show up, and then I’ll get back in production with THAT.
I absolutely find it hard to believe that this is AUGUST! I don’t know where the time goes, and our weather has been crappy since at least June. We’ve had rain almost every day, and many days that it just stayed overcast. I need some sun on my face!
Okay, so THIS isn’t getting out to enjoy the warm, sunny day. Thanks to whoever has allowed me to whine through this blog; I haven’t been keeping a paper journal, so this is my outlet on the good days and the blue days.
Take care, dear reader. Will write again soon.
~Ann
